TPM is admiring to advertise the winners of the Ninth Annual Golden Dukes acquainted the year’s best purveyors of accessible corruption, alien behavior, The Crazy and betrayals of the accessible trust. The awards are called in account of above Rep. Randy “Duke” Cunningham, who epitomizes the iconic avant-garde scandal.
Our celebrity judges—Hunter Walker, Dan Savage, Megan Carpentier, Hendrik Hertzberg, and Susie Bright—waded their way through all 22 finalists in 5 categories, and called the winners.
Check out the advantageous nominees and the clairvoyant emails that called them here. And now, afterwards added ado, the winners:
Best Scandal—General Interest: Dennis Hastert
Hunter Walker: Dennis Hastert
I acquire to accord this one to the above House Speaker. Alarm me old fashioned, but I anticipate sex scandals are the best scandals—and the best ones acquire a nice aroma of hypocrisy.
It’s amazing how abounding opponents of aforementioned sex alliance angry out to be in the closet isn’t it?
The sad allotment actuality is how abounding bodies were victimized on this. There are Hastert’s above acceptance and additionally the millions of bodies who were aching for activity aback they concluded up cerebration about him naked.
Dan Savage: Kevin McCarthy
Picking the “best” in this chic is difficult—because it depends on how you ascertain “best.”
Does “best” beggarly the best entertaining? Afresh it’s David “The Shitter” Vitter’s long-delayed come-uppance. If it agency the best shocking, afresh it’s Dennis Hastert’s acknowledgment as a animal predator. (Was anyone complex in the allegation of Bill Clinton not an adulterer, a sex offender, an asshole, or all three?) If “best” agency the best inevitable/predictable, afresh the “scandal” that abandoned Ben Carson takes the prize. (Unlike Trump, Carson was acutely a 2012-ish applicant aback his numbers started rising—a Bachmann/Gingrich/Cain/Santorum—and his abatement was no shock.) If “best” agency the best consequential, afresh it’s Kevin McCarthy, who abandoned (single-mouthedly? single-gaffedly?) apparent the Benghazi lath for the accessory hack/whack job it is, was, and consistently will be, exponentially accretion the allowance of President Hillary Clinton.
Since the rules anticipate me from declaring this one a four-way tie, I’m activity to go with brainless Kevin McCarthy—despite the abridgement of sex/sexual corruption bend in his (Vitter, Hastert), and some aggressive brainless (Carson).
Megan Carpentier: Dennis Hastert